You can be a successful single parent!
Let me clarify: YOU can be a successful single mom raising your children in the Lord!
Yes, you can! How do I know? Because I've walked the journey ahead of you and watched my children, who grew up in a single-parent home after an abusive situation, rebound and find their strength in the Lord. I've watched them grow into solid, godly, thriving young adults.
Not long ago, my 18-year-old son stood in front of his class on the first day of Bible college and shared his testimony as to why he was attending Bible school and not a regular university like his friends. He said, "I have watched how God has transformed my mom's life over the last few years, and I want that for myself. I want to continue the journey she started of growing in the Lord."
That was an incredible moment to witness because getting there wasn't easy. The enemy lobbed every attack it could against my son. Two accidents (soccer and on a bicycle) that resulted in surgeries, physical abuse from his father, the dark world of COVID-19, and the subsequent suicidal spirals that resulted…the list goes on. I remember entire nights spent on my knees praying for my son's mental health and well-being.
I had a choice. I could have wallowed in the negativity. I certainly had the opportunity. Life was hard! At one point, I was working 8 part-time jobs to try to stay afloat. It was all I could do to keep food on the table and my children clothed; how on earth was I supposed to add raising my children in the Lord to my list of responsibilities? It felt overwhelming and impossible. Then, I read a book that scared me to my core. It presented statistics of what happens to children whose single parent was not intentional in raising their children with a Biblical foundation. I determined right then I did NOT want those statistics to be true for my children, and I would do whatever I needed to make sure they had a solid foundation in Christ.
The Authority is Yours!
I hear the "but…'s" all the time. I can hear them right now coming through the wavelengths of technology. "I want to raise my kids in the Lord, but…”
Guess who God gave the authority to raise your children in the Lord? YOU! Not any list of "others,” but you, their mom. And guess who He will give the strength, wisdom, guidance, direction, and LOVE to raise your children in the Lord? YOU! That's who!
You are the mom God chose to raise your children, and He wants you to do it in a way that gives your children a solid foundation in the Lord, setting them on the path of righteousness. When they are young adults leaving the shadow of your wings, they must know what they believe and why so they can move forward confidently under the shadow of God’s wings.
Scripture is full of directives demonstrating God’s desire that your children be raised in faith, but He wants YOU to do it. Here are just a few examples:
- Deuteronomy 6:5-7a NIRV: "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul. Love him with all your strength. The commandments I give you today must be in your hearts. Make sure your children learn them."
- Psalm 154:4 NIRV: "Parents praise your works to their children. They tell about your mighty acts."
- Proverbs 19:18 NLT: "Discipline your children while there is hope. Otherwise, you will ruin their lives."
Scripture also tells us some of the rich rewards for doing this:
- Psalm 8:2 NIV: "Through the praise of children and infants you have established a stronghold against your enemies, to silence the foe and the avenger."
- Proverbs 6:22 KJV: "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it."
- Proverbs 17:6 NET: "Grandchildren are like a crown to the elderly, and the glory of children is their parents."
But…HOW?
Model your faith to your children! It is so simple that most people don't realize its effectiveness. Children imitate what they see and hear. If you are negative, spending time griping, gossiping, complaining, and being a downer, guess what your children will be like? Yep—you just modeled all of that for them!
Think of the opposite impact: your children see you worshipping God, spending time in His Word, and renewing your mind. You bless people. You are kind, giving, and caring. You are generous in word, action, and finances. Guess what your children will be like! Yep – you just modeled all of that for them! Scripture says that the mouth speaks out of the overflow of the heart. What is your mouth modeling to your children?
If you want to raise your children in the Lord, you start by growing yourself. Romans 12:2 says that we are not to be conformed to this world but need to renew our minds continually. We do this by connecting with God, specifically through reading and meditating on the Bible. As you are transformed by God's Word, your children will notice subtle changes in how you talk, think, and act. They will start to emulate you.
Here are some other practical tips to raise your children in the Lord:
- Start spending time in God's Word, and let your children SEE you doing it.
- Share with your children an insight God gave you as a result of your time with the Lord.
- Pray with your children.
- Pray for your children.
- Learn a Bible verse together. Say it in the car as you drive.
- Listen to kids worship songs together. Have a worship dance party!
- Read Christian books to your kids that teach godly principles. Discuss them!
- Learn God's promises. They are God's will. Start declaring them over your children.
- Find people moving in the same direction and align yourself with them.
- Seek wisdom, mentorship, guidance, and encouragement from moms who have successfully done this ahead of you. Ask for their tips. Pick their brains!
Moms, this is an extraordinary privilege that the Lord has given YOU. Don't abdicate your opportunity or your authority to anyone else. You can rise above the circumstances because you have the God who created the entire world on your side!
While you are responsible for raising your children in the Lord, the great news is that you don't have to do it alone! All those things I mentioned before: church, Christian school, clubs, summer camp, grandparents, etc…are there to support you. They are there to give you a much-needed break. They are there to reinforce what you are teaching from home.
BUT…none of them replace you. YOU, single mom, are much too valuable to your family and God to be so easily replaced.
Meet the author
A single mom for 13 years and Director of Women's Mentorship and Childhood Development Specialist for Legacy Family Ministries, Amy Sun's passion is to equip mothers in the why and how of raising their children in the Lord. After completing her B.A. in Christian Education from Arizona Christian University, Amy Sun’s pursued her passion to teach children in South Korea, Kazakhstan, India, and Austria and served as a missionary schoolteacher. In early 2023, Amy penned her first children’s book, Heart of the Kingdom. Her second book, Theo’s World, was published in August, 2024. Both books are allegories pointing children to a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
For online resources and more information on Amy, visit www.legacyfamilyministries.com.
The Life of a Single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. To date, the organization has worked with thousands of churches to start a single mom’s support group in cities throughout the U.S. and beyond, as well as having served more than one million single mothers with a variety of programs. Offering a large array of books, curriculum, training materials, online instructional videos, podcasts, newsletters, life skills education, and more, TLSM is one of the largest single mom organizations in the U.S. The robust selection of single mom programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, financially, and parentally through Single Mom University®, Single Moms Across America, the National TLSM Single Moms Conference, boot camps, and a variety of other programs. For more information, visit thelifeofasinglemom.com.
