When I am old and my days are coming to an end, I wonder what I’ll care about. Not to get too morbid too quick, but I keep on thinking about what it is going to be like when I am on my death bed. Who is going to be there? What are we going to talk about? What am I really going to care about when that day comes?
I am always amazed at the difference between the things I deem important and the things my children think are important. For example, here are the things I view as important:
– Having a clean house
– Preparing healthy meals
– Providing the best clothes and shoes
You get the point.
Here are the things my kids care about:
– Playing games with dad
– Building legos with mom
– Watching movies and eating pizza with their family
Providing for your family is without a doubt an important task, don’t get me wrong. Especially for a single mom, you have to play both provider and nurturer, both of which are full-time jobs. But when push comes to shove, experiences and memories are going to trump things we purchase every time.
My encouragement in this article is to keep the end in mind. When your days are coming to an end, you will be surrounded by your children. They will not speak of fancy shoes or how nice your house was, instead they will speak of the relationship they had with you. They will talk about family movie night, weekly walks you took around the block, and going to church every Sunday. They will laugh when remembering how you made every holiday special and how important you made them feel on their birthday. They will cry when the remember how you carved out time in your busy schedule to take them to get ice cream when they were having a hard time.
As you pray let peace take over your mind. Peace and the Single Mom can help when you are stressed, need relief, and don’t feel like there is enough time in the day. Click HERE to check it out and learn how to refocus on things in life that truly matter.
My mom worked two jobs when I was growing up. She worked her normal 9-5 job and got an extra job during the holidays to help buy me the things I want. While I appreciated the new video game and basketball jersey she bought me, what I really wanted was to spend time with my mom. Although I couldn’t articulate it at the time, I wanted her way more than I wanted what she could give me.
I get it. My mom wanted me to have what everyone else had. She wanted to give me the best because she thought I was the best. She wanted me to feel like all the other kids who got whatever they wanted. But the truth is I was not like all the other kids. I was raised by a single mom who only had 24 hours in a day to take care of me and of herself. While children from two-parent homes have the time and money for stuff and relationships, my mom and I didn’t have that luxury.
Of course you have to provide the essentials for your child, but when it comes to providing the best and providing quality time with your child, choose relationship every time. That will be what you speak of when you are older. Memories and traditions are what last the test of time. Laughter and time together is what makes life worth living. Way more than the newest shoes or game consol.
Make being with your child the top priority in your life. This world will tell you differently, but don’t listen to it. Your kids may seem like they don’t like to be with you or like they have a thousand other things to do, but don’t believe them. They want to be with you, they just might not know how to show it. One day they will thank you, even if today their words say the opposite.
Now that we have talked about the top priority in our lives, and been reminded of how crucial quality time is, HERE are some ideas of fun things you and your kids can do, as we all strive to be present and intentional.
The Lord changed Zach Garza’s life through mentoring, when he was a kid heading down a dark path with no one to guide him. Now, as the founder and Executive Director of Forerunner Mentoring Program in Dallas, Texas, Zach equips and encourages mentors to build relationships with kids who were just like him. Using his experience as a teacher and coach in a low income school in his community, Zach built an organization that transforms the lives of kids through the power of positive mentoring relationships founded on Jesus Christ and by supporting the child growing up without a father in the home and the single mother. If you’d like to hear more from Zach, you can listen to him on his podcast “You Can Mentor” on all available podcast channels or visit youcanmentor.com.
The Life of a Single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. To date, the organization has worked with hundreds of churches to start a single mom’s support group in cities throughout the U.S. and beyond, as well as having served hundreds of thousands of single mothers with a variety of programs. Offering a large array of books, curriculum, training materials, online instructional videos, podcasts, newsletters, life skills education, and more, TLSM is one of the largest single mom organizations in the U.S. The robust selection of single mom programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, financially, and parentally through Single Mom University, Single Moms Across America, the National TLSM Single Moms Conference, boot camps, and a variety of other programs. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com.
