The Light Yoke of Jesus for the Weary Single Mother by Anna Meade Harris

Riffing off the opening lines of Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice: it is a truth, universally acknowledged, that a single parent in possession of one or more children must be in want of a nap.

At least a nap. A season of hibernation might be more like it.

As I interviewed single parents for my book God’s Grace for Every Family: Biblical Encouragement for Single-Parent Families and the Churches That Seek to Love Them Well, the chronic busyness and the unshared weight of raising a child alone, and the resulting exhaustion were almost always the first thing a parent would mention. “How are you,” I would ask, and the answer was nearly always, “tired,” sometimes, “exhausted,” paired with “busy.”

To be fair, all parents are busy. But the single mom has to buy all the groceries, remember every oil change, pay every bill, and clean up after every stomach bug, not to mention serving as counselor, disciplinarian, educator, spiritual mentor, and mother for their child. No one is coming to help, and just knowing that makes the exhaustion oppressive.

This passage has been printed on mugs and t-shirts, cross-stitched in pillows, and tossed out as a platitude far too often. Don’t let familiarity rob these words of their power, but meditate on them slowly. What words ring out in your soul as you read them today?

“Come to me…”

Jesus extends an openhearted invitation, not only to follow him, as He had earlier in Matthew (4:19), but to come to Him. It’s personal. It’s almost as if He is holding out His hand and smiling, looking you in the eye with compassion and delight. There’s nothing begrudging here, nothing but warmth in those words. Coming to Jesus is like walking into outstretched arms.

“… all you who are weary and burdened.”

Jesus does not discriminate based on why you are tired or why your burdens are heavy. Jesus wants you - burdens and all. He wants our family and your children, no matter what your past looks like, even with your pain. No hint of rejection, scrutiny, or judgment here. He holds nothing back from you.

“I will give you rest.”

Do you remember what it is to rest? Do you wonder what it might look like in your single-parent life? With kids and work and everything you have to take care of, rest sounds like a miracle on par with the parting of the Red Sea. You wonder how Jesus helps with the never-ending list of things to do, not to mention the things that never get done. And yet He promises rest, and God cannot lie. He wants to give you a gift if you will but come receive it by faith.

“Take my yoke upon you and learn from me…”

The infinite difference between our strength and Jesus’ strength means He will be pulling the load. Sharing the yoke keeps us close to Jesus and teaches us to move with Him. Everything is much, much harder than it needs to be when we strain against the yoke by trying to go our own way or by trying to pull as if it all depends on us.

“… for I am gentle and humble in heart.”

The gentleness of Jesus comforts those whom life has treated harshly. Trusting his gentleness brings rest when we are short on cash, in a power struggle with an ex, or lying awake worrying about a depressed child.

“And you will find rest for your souls.”

Jesus reiterated the promise of rest. He really means it. Maybe it feels like God failed to keep a promise when our marriage fell apart or your spouse died or your boyfriend left. Pour out your feelings of loss and even betrayal, if you feel God has let you down. Job felt that way, and Jeremiah, and David. Even Jesus raised the anguished question, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? (Matt. 27:46).

Biblical lament unburdens our souls by leading us to confront the sovereignty and, eventually, the goodness of Jesus. Jesus does not offer a rest that that gets us out from under our responsibilities, but rather soul rest, which is the peace that passes understanding even smack in the middle of your exhausting single-parent life. Rest for our souls flows from the cross, where Jesus dealt once and for all with our sin. That cross shows us the price Jesus was willing to pay to reconcile us to Himself. In Christ, we are children of a compassionate Father who knows what we need and gives it freely. We cannot fathom how deeply He loves us.

“My yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

The yoke of Jesus is “easy” in the sense that it requires us to prove nothing. God looks at us and sees His Son, who has already lived the sinless life we couldn’t live. Jesus secured our righteousness, so we don’t have to (we can’t), and our children don’t have to secure it for us either.

With that pressure relieved, we can carry the pressure of our daily lives in constant connection with our infinitely strong yokemate, Jesus. We can ask other people for help when we need it because we no longer have to justify ourselves by meeting every single need in our own strength, giving our children everything they want (or everything their friends have), or raising kids whose outward behavior appears to validate our parenting.

Jesus bears the burden for your child’s life. Trusting him with your child can lift your sense of exhaustion and free you to better love your child. Yoked and strong by your side, Jesus will teach you how to carry your child in his strength.