At every stage of the lives of my children I have had those “Mommy Moments“. You know those times when your heart almost bursts out of your skin with pride, with joy, or even with an ache only a mother can feel. My first Mommy Moment was when the doctor announced over 30 years ago “It’s a GIRL!”.
I have experienced excruciating Mommy Moments when a child screamed with pain over the absence of his dad, or when another child confessed a life of promiscuity. I have learned much about repentance when I have experienced those Mommy Moments when I react instead of respond in love. My heart has overflowed in those Mommy Moments when I watched a children preach a message to over 500 children at the age of 12; or participate on a worship team to thousands; or graduate from college; marriages, and hearing children repeat to their friends counsel you had given them…All of these make GREAT MOMMY MOMENTS.
This past Sunday I experienced yet another amazing Mommy Moment.
I sat in church between my two youngest adult children (both boys). They were worshiping God; by choice. They were with their mother; by choice. They were smiling, enjoying the time together; by choice. And one son had even invited a friend of his to join us. Behind me, another single mother who helped develop the non-profit The Single MOM KC, sat behind me having her own Mommy Moment. Both of her adult children were present on one side of her and her parents were on the other side of her. All of these relationships had at one time been broken and bloody and now she sat overwhelmed with the good work of the one we know as Restorer.
My Mommy Moment continued through the day as my sons treated me to lunch and bubble tea; we laughed and enjoyed showing my sons friend a unique area of town. We spent time listening to one another and caught up on life. These moments of relationship are the most wonderful Mommy Moments I could ever imagine.
Oftentimes the Mommy Moments we experience after our children are grown and out of the house might be the sweetest; because they come as a result of choice, choice by our sons and daughters to be a part of our lives and to allow us to be a part of their lives.
These Mommy Moments that come later in life make us realize “it was all worth it”. All the sacrifices, all the tears, all the prayers, all the holding the line, discipline, heartache, etc; it is ALL worth it when we experience the joy of relationship with our adult children.
Oftentimes single mothers don’t think about the future relationship with their children. Many are trying to make it through the day. But if you pause and consider what you want for your relationship with your children now, while they are still young, you and the Father can begin to work that vision into their lives.
Consider what kind of character qualities you enjoy in your friends; that will help you determine what you want for yourself and your children:
- Sense of humor
- A Party Waiting To Happen
Develop a vision for your relationship with your children when they become adults. Ask yourself a lot of questions and determine what is important to you as you look to the future.
- Do you want to be the mom who lives with her kids?
- Do you want to have the family for dinner every Sunday?
- Do you want to be the Wise Counselor who your children seek for wisdom?
- Do you want to have your adult children independent and able to live and function on their own?
- Do you want to WANT to be around your children?
- Do you want to be a part of their lives?
Submit the desires of your heart to the Father.
Always give Him your hopes and your dreams, if you don’t; you will begin to strive to make it happen and then things get really messy.
Ask Him if your plans align with His and always be open to Him altering or shifting your heart
Pray for yourself and your children.
Remember He is the God who invented FAMILY. His desire is for relationship and family so you can trust Him with your family.
Take time to THANK HIM for what He has done and what He is going to do:
Father, Today we acknowledge that you are the God of love and you are for our family. You are the builder of relationship and the restorer of the broken places. You have plans for us to love one another both now and in the future and your plans are good. Thank you that you are giving me a long term vision of what is in your heart for our family as my children grow and step into life as adults. I know you will lead me as I submit my ways to you. Your word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. You will show me the way in your word to bring this family into the fullness of your love for us and our love for one another. I am excited to be on this great adventure with you! Let your kingdom come, here in my heart and in my home as it is in heaven.
God Release the JOY FILLED MOMMY MOMENTS.
Misty Honnold is the founder of The Single Mom KC. A single mother of four, her greatest life work has been loving and leading her family well. Misty is sought out for discipleship, advice, and inspiration regarding single parents. She founded Mountain of Myrrh in 2009 to professionally assist single mothers and their surrounding communities. Since that time, she has traveled domestically and internationally to train, teach, and equip churches and communities to love and aide single mothers. She has been featured in Overwhelmed: The Single Moms Magazine and hosts Mocha Moments for Single Moms. She is a member and writer for 1 Corinthians Parenting and has also hosted KLOVE Radio’s Single Parents events with over 600 single moms. For more info, visit thesinglemomkc.org.
The Life of a Single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s support group in cities throughout the U.S. and beyond. We have a large array of books, curriculum, training materials, and online instructional videos to support ministry leaders who lead single moms. Our single mom programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, financially, and parentally through a number of projects including: Single Mom University, Single Moms Across America, the National TLSM Single Moms Conference, and a variety of programs throughout the U.S. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com