I looked forward to my 50th birthday with hopeful expectation. I chose to jump out of an airplane to celebrate my 50th birthday. However, it wasn’t what I expected. I wasn’t afraid, I am the kind of person who loves adventure and am always trying to find someone to experience the crazy twists and turns of life with. It just wasn’t the adrenaline rush I thought it would be. I thought I would get done and have that “WOW, let’s do it again” feeling. However, I got done and thought, well that was nice but I probably wouldn’t pay to do it again.
So it has been with this year of transitions. I have had 2 children get married, one graduate, I have walked through the loss of my first grandchild through a miscarriage, and the hopeful expectation of another. My youngest moved out of the home for a season, and at that same time my physical health plummeted. Life is never what we expect, is it.
As I stepped into the holiday season in 2014 I was surrounded with gaiety. Everyone seemed to be thankful for something. My first inclination is to close the doors of my house and throw myself a pity party. A friend had once said “Misty, you are a party waiting to happen”, but, without my children, the party had been pushed out of me. I was now the ‘party pooper’.
During this season, I had plenty of time to reflect on life and what I was thankful for. Interestingly enough the phrase “I am thankful for the disruption in my life my children have caused” kept coming to mind. Each one of them erupted in this world, created and longing to be loved and nurtured. I had to learn that life wasn’t about me, my desires, my schedule etc. Teething, congestion, hunger, nightmares and more disrupted my nights. My days were disrupted by feedings, teaching and training, lessons, doctor visits etc. However, each beautiful disruption gave me an open opportunity to change, to grow and learn and to become more Christ-like. More often than not I failed at the invitation to change.
Now as they have all grown, and the house is quiet. I sit and rejoice at the messy disruptions I have faced for the last 30 years. When I want to lock myself in my house and throw my pity party, I recall all the messy sloppy disruptions and I rejoice at the woman they have made me. I can embrace this season with hope.
Proverbs 31: 25 says “She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.” When life circumstances change dramatically, we get to decide how we will face the future. So if you are looking at your children transitioning out of the home and wonder ‘what will I do’, Grab your party had and your dancing shoes and decide to ENJOY the days to come!
Misty Honnold is the founder of The Single Mom KC. A single mother of four, her greatest life work has been loving and leading her family well. Misty is sought out for discipleship, advice, and inspiration regarding single parents. She founded Mountain of Myrrh in 2009 to professionally assist single mothers and their surrounding communities. Since that time, she has traveled domestically and internationally to train, teach, and equip churches and communities to love and aide single mothers. She has been featured in Overwhelmed: The Single Moms Magazine and hosts Mocha Moments for Single Moms. She is a member and writer for 1 Corinthians Parenting and has also hosted KLOVE Radio’s Single Parents events with over 600 single moms. For more info, visit thesinglemomkc.org.
The Life of a Single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. To date, we have worked with more than 1,500 churches & community groups to start or improve a single mom’s support group in cities throughout the U.S. and beyond. We have a large array of books, curriculum, training materials, and online instructional videos to support ministry leaders who lead single moms. Our single mom programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, financially, and parentally through a number of projects including: Single Mom University, Single Moms Across America, the National TLSM Single Moms Conference, and a variety of programs throughout the U.S. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com