I’m preparing to teach a “parenting teens” class at my church and as I work on my curriculum, I find myself considering the single moms who will attend. How will they feel about my advice to spend individual time with each child? How will they feel about my recommendation to make sure they get time to themselves each week to recharge? What will they think about my assertions that a daily quiet time with the Lord, preferably in the morning, is vital? I know what they’ll think–because I’ve been there.
At a certain stage in my single parenting, when I had a teenager, a pre-teen, and a young one, I would have rolled my eyes and my thoughts would have gone something like this:
Time with each child individually? Um…I’m working to put food on the table, and then I spend my evening getting through homework, baths, laundry, packing lunches…I’m not taking one kid to Applebees. Not happening.Me time? Is she kidding? Who’s going to watch my kids while I go to the spa? Oh…and who’s going to pay for that babysitter…and the spa?Daily quiet time? Yeah. I mean, good goal and all…but when I fall into bed at midnight, I’m not getting up at 5. So…that’s going to have to wait.What else ya got?
Check out more information HERE!
Looking back now, I am reminded that my frustrations were founded in my reality. I wasn’t playing a sympathy card. I wasn’t feeling sorry for myself. I was simply doing what I had to do to parent my kids alone–and it was hard work. But you know what? Life is not a whole lot different today. I have five kids (three of them are five–triplets), I have to work to provide half of the income for my family, and my husband works. I have many ministry duties and run a business. I still have bills to pay and demands to meet.
Family is work. Parenting is HARD. But there are some basics that are important commitments to make no matter what the circumstances are. To me, these are non-negotiables:
- Spend quality, fun time with your kids–laugh together.
- Take a break–there are people who will help you if you reach out.
- Have your daily quiet time. When your relationship with God is front and center, the rest falls into place.
“But you, take courage! Do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded.” 2 Chr. 15:7, ESV
Nicole O’Dell Wellman, author of 25 books since 2007 and an entrepreneur. She writes and speaks to youth, women, and parents on preparing for life’s tough choices. The mother of six, including triplets, is busy with life’s demands, as many mothers are, but also feels strong passion to bring all moms into deep intimacy with the Lord. Hot Buttons, O’Dell’s non-fiction series for parents, pre-empts peer pressure by tackling tough issues and was endorsed by Focus on the Family. Nicole is a long-time friend of The Life of a Single Mom® and our ministry team.
The Life of a Single Mom is a national, faith-based, nonprofit that exists to see that no single mom walks alone. To date, the organization has worked with hundreds of churches to start a single mom’s support group in cities throughout the U.S. and beyond, as well as having served hundreds of thousands of single mothers with a variety of programs. Offering a large array of books, curriculum, training materials, online instructional videos, podcasts, newsletters, life skills education, and more, TLSM is one of the largest single mom organizations in the U.S. The robust selection of single mom programs focus on empowering single moms to grow spiritually, emotionally, financially, and parentally through Single Mom University, Single Moms Across America, the National TLSM Single Moms Conference, boot camps, and a variety of other programs. For more information, visit www.thelifeofasinglemom.com.
