You may be wondering what a grown man may have to say to you as a single mom. What possible advice could I give? Is it that I am a pastor? Yes, I am, but that is not the place where I am going to be coming from in these articles. My articles to you are going to be written from the perspective of a fatherless son because I am one. When I was 10 months old my dad left our home in Pennsylvania and went back to his hometown of Las Vegas, NV. He never returned. This was devastating to my mom and our family. I know first-hand what your children are going through because I have been there. I also got to watch my mom and the struggles she went through. I am going to write from the point of view of your children if they were talking to you twenty or thirty years from now.
We have started a new year which means most of us are off to a fresh start. One of my favorite passages of Scripture talking about this is Philippians 3:13-14: “Brothers, I do not count myself to have attained, but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal to the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” MEV. There are several different ways we could look at this passage, but I want to look at it with you in mind. As a single mom, there are four different ingredients for you to experience a fresh start.
1.) Forgive Yourself – It says in verse 13 “forgetting those things which are behind.” As a single mom, you have to let go of your past mistakes. My mom and I were talking recently about some of the bad decisions she made when raising us, and I told her that it is all in the past. You have to let those past mistakes go. You have to give them to God, turn from them, and not think of them again. We all make mistakes. Stop beating yourself up. Move forward. Make things right with others and God and forgive yourself and cast those past mistakes into the depths of the sea and don’t let them return to your life again. It is time for a fresh start in the way you look at yourself. You are not perfect. No one is, but through a personal relationship with Christ, He gives us the perfection that we need.
2.) Forgive Others – Part of forgetting the things in your past is forgiving those who have hurt you in your past. This could be one person or a whole slew of people, but if you want a fresh start, you have to forgive anyone that you have bitterness towards. Being bitter at those individuals will only hurt you. The Bible tells us in Ephesians 4:31-32 to “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, outbursts, and blasphemies, with all malice, be taken away from you. And be kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christ also forgave you.” MEV. This is very important to a fresh start and something that we need to do quickly! Don’t let bitterness, wrath, anger, outbursts, blasphemies and malice linger in your life! Forgive others and move on! I know this is easier said than done. It took me many years to forgive my dad for how he used to beat up my mom, for how he threw me across the room to the police in a drunken rampage when I was 9 months old, for how he never paid child support, and for some other things, but I had to forgive him. I don’t tell you this to brag on myself but to give you an example of forgiveness regardless of what the person has done to you. Who do you need to forgive? Don’t wait! Forgive today!
3.) Focus on the Future – In Phil. 3:14 it says “I press toward the goal to the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” MEV After you forget the past, you have to focus on the future! To get a fresh start we have to set Christ centered goals! Our goals for this year and going forward should all be centered on living for God and laying up treasures in Heaven! What goals could you set for this year that have Jesus at the center of them?
4.) Follow Jesus – This might sound simple but has there ever been a time where you prayed to God and put your faith in Jesus Christ? Before you can truly forgive yourself, before you can forgive others, and before you can focus on your future, you have to follow Jesus with your life through realizing you are a sinner, realizing your sin leads to Hell, realizing that Jesus died and paid the penalty for the sins of humanity, realizing that He is he only way to Heaven, and finally realizing that you have to put your faith and trust in Jesus by praying and asking Him to save you from your sins. You can find out more about Salvation here on our website: http://www.godismydad.com/meet-god/.
Begin your fresh start today! Don’t wait! Start with #4 if you have never been saved and then work on 1-3. These 4 things in themselves will transform your life and your family!
Sean and Jackie Teis started Life Factors Ministries in 2008 to spread hope to fatherless homes. Through Life Factors Ministries they are leading fatherless families to the Heavenly Father through spreading awareness, creating unique resources, speaking, and partnering with other ministries. Sean has spoken around the country at various events. Some of the unique resources they have published include: The Fatherless Journey for Girls (For Teen Girls) The Fatherless Journey for Guys (For Teen Guys), and The Single Mom Journey. They are partnering with churches around the country giving them the online training and digital and physical resources needed to effectively evangelize and disciple the fatherless families in their church and community. In addition to their work with Life Factors Sean also serves as the Student Pastor at Colonial Baptist Church in Venice, FL while Jackie is home with their three children, homeschooling two of them. You can find out more about Sean and Jackie Teis and Life Factors at lifefactors.org.