5 Steps to Finding Strength in Your Single Mom Battle

You need to know that finding strength to battle is not about the specific battle you face or how hard it may be or even how strong you may be. It is about understanding your identity in the One who wins every battle. We must get good at the battle, no doubt. It’s coming, and it’ll keep coming, as Jesus told us. (See John 16:33). Different weapons at various intervals are required. The weapon of forgiveness will be required. The weapon of prayer. The weapon of praise. The weapon of the Word – sharper than a two-edged sword. forgive. The weapon of faith. The weapon of being quiet and waiting upon the Lord.

Here are some additional things the Lord has taught in the midst of my most intense battles:

There have been many seasons and many battles in my life that seemed too great to endure. Abuse and poverty and death and disappointment and single parenting and stress. You name it. The raging waves came, time and again, crashing over me with barely a moment to catch my breath before another came to take me down. I have drawn the white flag from my pocket, more than once, certain I would throw it at any moment. But God has sustained me. When I thought my rebellious teenagers were going to take me out, He gave me just one more fight in me. When the critics of ministry were loud, I kept putting one foot in front of the other. When the pain of grief and loss put me on my knees and I thought I couldn’t cry another tear, my Father lifted my head. 

Perseverance is about the power of God rising up on the inside of us to hold us, when we feel weak. That power won’t allow us to quit. That’s true strength. Strength in the battle is about pushing through, when everything in you screams quit! Strength is fighting when it seems fruitless. Hell hath no fury like a woman of God who chooses to rise up, pray, praise and persevere. To tap into that power that allows you to refuse to quit, get good at praise and prayer. Get good at learning what the Word says about you.  

We really do not like to hear that, do we? But the strength muscle is developed, when we have something to be strong in! When I see women who can do fifty push-ups, I admire that (especially since this girl has never successfully pushed passed about ten!) I recognize that it took some practice to achieve that physical strength. Your strength will come through battles. It will come through experience. Strength is not developed on the mountain-top, when everything that your feet touch is blessed and the victory flag is swiftly flowing through the wind. No, strength is developed, when you are surrounded on all sides and the power of your God shows up and shocks you with His perfect timing and provision. God is developing strength – deep in the depths of your soul and the hardship will be worth it. As you are in the midst of yet another battle, remind yourself that you will arrive on the other side stronger than when you went in. There may be some war wounds, but they will make for powerful stories of God’s faithfulness. 

The world has taught us weakness is a flaw. Vulnerability is to be mocked and trampled. However, our weakness boasts of God’s glory. Our strength is not our own. Any victory is by the power of a faithful God. I don’t know about you, but I have gotten into a whole heap of trouble, when I try to battle in my own strength. My own strength will leave me exhausted and defeated. But the strength of God? Well, that strength is promised victory.  It’s not by our strength, but by His spirit. Strength is not about doing church well or pretending we have it all together or perfection.  The strength of God is not about legalism, traditionalism or a set of rules. Strength is about having an encounter with our King. Strength understands the God we belong to who set the sun in the sky, the stars in the night and commands the sea with the sounds of His voice and speaks peace to the storm. Strength is not about how good we are or how fast we run, it’s about how holy and good and powerful He is. His strength is made perfect in our weakness, so get weak before the Lord. Invite Him into the space of your weakness.  

The Lord will show up in unexpected ways and at unexpected times. Maybe you have been praying for days, weeks, or years about a situation, and have become weary. But all of a sudden, in a day, in a moment, God shows up on the scene and does the miraculous. I am reminded of the story of the dying servant in Luke 7:1-10. The Roman Officer sent for Jesus to come to heal his servant. Ultimately, the servant is healed, but he is not healed when Jesus prays for him, fasts, lays hands on him, or even sees him. He is healed by the faith of the Roman Officer. That seemed strange to me, to be honest, when I first read it. He didn’t do anything to be healed, except ask, and it didn’t come in the traditional form that maybe I thought it should. But the healing and strength came, nonetheless. Someone reading today just needs to know that God sees you and that He will work things out for your good, in His timing, His way. The end of the battle will likely be in a different time that you expect and the results will likely be different than you expected, as well. But do you know what I know for certain? Our God is in the beauty-from-ashes business. The mess of our battles gives Him prime position to birth the most beautiful of testimonies.

As a daughter of the King, you are an heir of His authority. When we walk in authority, the authority Jesus paid for us to have, our perspective shifts and we see ourselves differently. We see ourselves stronger. We see our situations differently. We see that the enemy must flee. We see that though the wall is tall, it falls.  We see that though 10,000 encamp around us, they all fall. We see our purposes become bigger.  There may be many dark days where victory doesn’t seem evident from any side. I’m sure Moses knew something about that. Daniel and Joseph and David could probably all relate. But we know the end of their stories. The end of your story will be no different. 

Here are a few encouraging Scriptures that I go back to in the height of my own battles.  

Isaiah 41:9-10, “I have called you back from the ends of the earth, saying you are my servant. For I have chosen you and will not throw you away. Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” 

Isaiah 45:5-7, “I am the Lord; there is no other God. I have equipped you for battle, though you don’t even know me, so all the world from east to west will know there is no other God. I am the Lord; there is no other. I create the light and make darkness. I send good times and bad times. I, the Lord, am the one who does the things.”