3 Ways to Give Your Changing Body Grace by Heather Creekmore

Perhaps stores should just re-label dressing rooms as “shame capsules.” Little stalls you enter when you want to question your worth and value. Am I the only one who feels this way?

First of all, there’s the lighting. Let’s be real: fluorescents don’t flatter any face. Then there are the mirrors. We may be better off with the crazy ones from the carnival. Perhaps I’d like the clothes better if I looked like a stretched-out piece of licorice wearing them. I don’t know if it’s the angle or quality; all I know is that most dressing room mirrors are not helpful.

Finally, there are the size tags. You grab the number you think you need, only to find out that someone graded on a curve when they assigned those digits to that pair of jeans. Apparently, their curve did not take into account your curves!

No matter who you blame—the babies, the aging, long work hours, or the one that always leaves sweets in the break room — the truth is, there’s nothing abnormal about body change. In fact, it’s almost a guarantee that your body won’t look the same at forty as it did at twenty. Frankly, it’d be kind of strange if at sixty you looked thirty, or at thirty you looked thirteen.  Yet, there’s this unspoken pressure that most of us face to stop our bodies from changing. We fight the post-pregnancy shifts, hoping to “bounce back” to our pre-baby shapes as quickly as a celebrity. We refuse to “age,” praying to find the right products and rituals to fend off signs that we’ve celebrated more birthdays. For some, the body change frustration is as regular as lunchtime. They stress over a full stomach that pooches a little during digestion.

But, today I ask you: Is it more normal for bodies to change or to stay the same? Wasn’t it God who designed our stomachs to expand as we eat and our hips to expand when we’re expecting a child?

Though marketers tell us that we can buy all the right things to fight with our bodies and win, I wonder if there’s not more to the story. Perhaps body change isn’t as bad as we’ve been told it is. How much shame could we lift if we stopped fighting our bodies and instead allowed them the grace to change? Here are three ideas to give grace to your changing body.

1 // Recognize that body change is a normal part of the human experience. 

It’s easy for us to accept that toddlers turn into children who turn into teens and then transform into adults. But, there’s no scientific reason for us to believe the change stops then. Puberty, pregnancy, menopause, aging—body change is a normal part of it all. Our bodies are living organisms; they’re always adapting to whatever we ask of them. In some seasons, our bodies will look different than in other seasons, depending on what we’re going through. Everything we experience in life, we experience through our bodies. While I am not advocating for unhealthy eating habits, we have to learn to give our bodies the grace to change and adapt to whatever circumstances or season we are in.

2 // Realize that change can be healthy.

Did you know that when your body feels stressed, it adapts to help you function better? For some of us, that means adding a few pounds in case we’re in danger of missing a meal. Your body was designed by God to help keep you alive, not to win beauty pageants. If you gain or lose weight in certain seasons, give yourself grace that your body is trying to help you get through it and keep you alive.

Instead of denying it food or fighting with it like it’s your worst enemy, try determining to be on the same team as your body. God created your body to be smart enough to signal you when you’re tired, hungry, thirsty, or overwhelmed. What would it look like to listen and respond to your body's cues? Sure, as a single mom it’s not always easy to take a rest when you need one. But, even stopping for two minutes to sit on the couch, take a few deep breaths, and close your eyes can reset your body to face whatever comes next. Body change is not the enemy. Neither is your body the enemy. The real enemy just maybe all those voices of marketers that tell you to ignore what your body needs and follow their plan instead.

3 // Know that God made your body GOOD, no matter what you feel.

There are some seasons when you may not like the way your body looks. But, during these times, you have a unique opportunity to practice your faith. Can you believe that your value is more than how you look or what size you wear? Do you know that you were made on purpose for a purpose? Can you believe the truth of God’s word—that you were knit together, intentionally, by the same God who created the sun, moon, and stars?

When we’re tempted to disparage our bodies or feel overwhelmed with frustration from the impact of aging, babies, or a busy schedule on our bodies—remember that body shame never comes from God. He’s not sitting in heaven shaking his head at you for eating takeout again. Shame never helps us reach our physical health goals, anyway. Instead, I picture God smiling down and reminding us not to worry. (Matthew 6:25-34) Of all the things we stress over, I wonder if the size of our jeans shouldn’t come off of that list. Our bodies will never stop changing, so why fight them to fit a certain ideal? Instead, why not remember that God loves us beyond what we measure? Even when we don’t feel loveable, His love doesn’t depend on our feelings. We can give grace to our changing bodies and feel peace as we pursue his purpose for our lives, no matter what our size or shape.